the act of forgiving

In my psych class we had to read a passage about forgiveness. And it was really interesting to have someone write about this. The definition of forgiveness is to give up resentment of or claim to requital. The author in the passage spoke in depth about how we see people who forgive others as weak and a push over. When in reality they are not. They also explained how  emotions block the mind and how the act of refusing to forgive can, in fact, lead to several different forms of darkness. It is interesting because instead of forgiving others we react in violent and angry ways. And the is what leads us to darkness. So we are pretty much teaching the new generations that violence is the way you should react when someone does you dirty.

Usually, when you are angry with someone your reaction is to want to get back at them or hurt them in some way.  And most of the time, to get revenge, you want to do what they did to you, right back to them. But then this situation just leaves you as a hypocrite because you are doing the same thing you were angry about with them in the first place. It is a really interesting concept that I never really thought about but now I see how that is what people do as their first reaction.

So now when I am angry with someone I think I just need to practice forgiving people. I do not have to agree with what they did or anything but I can just not let the anger take over my body. I think that it will help a lot people who tried this as well. And I think it would be beneficial to the future generations to come.

6 Replies to “the act of forgiving”

  1. One thing that is very hard is to forgive someone. After someone has crossed you the trust is gone and everything is all messed up. But you can’t prevail through the tough times without faith. My mom always told me that “You don’t know someone until something happens”. Once I actually figured out what that meant I learned how to forgive. It’s better to forgive someone then fill yourself with hate. But that doesn’t mean you have to be their friend anymore you just move on from the situation. As I always say I can forgive you but I won’t forget. What that means is yeah I might forgive ou but I won’t forget what you did to me and I won’t allow you to put me in that position again.

  2. I also try and step back before lashing out at someone, to try and see their side of view. However, sometimes it’s very hard. Especially with a family member, someone in my family hurt me pretty badly a few years ago and it was definitely difficult to forgive, or even forget. It was always in the back of my mind, which turned into straight up ignoring the person. Forgiving is definitely a process and could take years depending on how much the situation affected you. There’re times I’ve felt I couldn’t forgive or I didn’t know where to start, but once you’ve forgiven, it can feel like weight being lifted off your chest.

  3. Great job this is a very well written blog. I learned a lot more about forgiveness through your blog. I agree with everything you said 100%. Forgiveness in a way if very complicated because the concept its self is not hard, but the act of forgiveness is very hard. Throughout the years I learned that when I don’t forgive those who have hurt me I am doing more damage to myself because I am holding on to that pain. Also, as you’ve mentioned getting back at the person is doing what they have done to you which just starts a cycle of pain. Overall, people need to forgive more often because it makes one stronger and at ease.

  4. That’s so great that this class has helped you understand what forgiving is about. My mom always said forgiveness is not for the person who did you wrong its for yourself. So, that you won’t enter those dark places but that you will forgive that person for you so you won’t be bitter or angry but that you will have peace. She also said you can forgive but you don’t have to forget what they have done. Now, sometimes I’m not sure if I agree, because if you forgiven that person then you shouldn’t be thinking about it. But I think she was saying you can forgive the person but you don’t have to be there friend again or forget what they did in order to make you feel better or like I guess to just guard yourself so you won’t allow them to do it again! But great I hope you keep learning to forgive for your peace of mind!!

  5. Forgive but never forget. My parents always taught me holding grudges or getting back at someone because they did you dirty was always a wrong route to choose. It’s so easy for us to quickly think of a revenge plan on the person who did us dirty, but we are bigger than that. It just takes a minute to yourself to realize that you are being the bigger person just by forgiving them. You just have to hope they don’t make the same mistake again. But also, I feel like when you forgive someone, it just makes you feel at peace. At the end of the day, you don’t want drama.

  6. I am also in psychology right now and I found the forgiveness section quite interesting. Sometimes it is difficult to forgive depending on the situation, but kind of relaxing and taking a step back from the situation can help to not do anything to crazy and out of the box. It definitely is a difficult thing to deal with and I think everyone struggles with it in some form.

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