Truly forgiving someone is very hard for most people, including myself. Looking at someone who has harmed you in a positive light is one of the hardest things I have personally ever done. However, it is essential for your healing process to truly forgive the person who has wronged you. Holding a grudge does NOTHING but harm you and only you. Forgiveness is not just for the other person, it is for your own mental health. You cannot officially move on unless you make peace with what happened. Many people have mentioned the saying “forgive and forget” in their blog post. I think you should fully forgive someone, but you should not forget what that person did to you. My ex-boyfriend cheated on me several times. I forgave him fully and have made my peace with what happened, but I refuse to forget what happened so I do not make the same mistake again. Do you think it is detrimental to forgive but not forget?
This week’s article talks about the behavior of interpersonal relationships and how they effect us. It also discusses how experiences from our childhood help mold our relationships later on in life. Friendship wise, I believe the friends you have as a child help you choose your friend group later on in life. My friends in grade school were very untrustworthy so now it takes me a long time to warm up to people and fully consider them a good friend of mine. However, since I am more cautious of who my friends are, I found an amazing group of people to surround myself with because I know what I don’t want in a friendship.
As for romantic relationships, growing up in a large Greek family I constantly was told different traits to look for in a husband at a young age. My family is still very traditional in a sense where if you are a woman getting married and finding a husband is priority number one. I see myself subconsciously being attracted to the type of guys that I was told to look for as a child. I always knew your childhood effected how you view things in life, but this article laid it out as more of a science which is easier to grasp for me personally. There is no definition of how a relationship “should” be because everyone’s idea of a successful relationship is different depending on what they grew up with. My question would be for those who grew up with unhealthy relationships around them, how do you realize what you are experiencing is not a “healthy relationship”. As children we think everything our parents do is right, so when do you realize the example you have had all these years is not something to immitate?
This weeks article, The role of Positive Emotions in Positive Psychology , really teaches us what positive psychology is by using the broaden-and-build-theory. The broaden-and-build-theory tells us that if we continue to build positive emotions towards all situations it will increase our happiness in our every day life. Continuously stressing out and being negative about something that has already happened and cannot be changed is NOT going to fix it. However, some people argue if you do not confront the problem and continue to ignore it then you will make the same mistake. I agree with that to an extent. I think it is important to address what went wrong and think of a solution, but after it is out of your control you should let it go and have a positive about the situation. If someone fails an exam, you should address why you failed and how you should fix it, but after that you should see it as a learning lesson and use it to motivate you to do well on the next on! Do you guys agree with that? Do you think this is a way to just ignore your problems?
Depression is an intense mental disorder that many people do not take seriously. No one really understand where it comes from, however we do know that with a combination of therapy and medication it can be managed. I have studied depression a lot on my own since I suffer from depression myself. Due to previous research I already knew that the hippocampus is smaller in those who suffer from depression than those who do not. This is because depression causes less growth of brain cells in the hippocampus causing it to shrink. I did not know that the United States and the United Kingdom have mental illness rates above 20 percent,which is twice as high as it was in the eighties. As technology advances we put more pressure on ourselves to be “flawless” because we have such advance resources available to us at all times. However, just because our computers and cell phones are constantly being upgraded, does not mean we are.The human body is a machine that can only handle but so much before it self destructs. The constant stress of wanting everything and everyone to be perfect is the reason why mental illness has doubled in the last forty years. I really do not have any questions on this article but I’m curious how many of you would willingly participate in electroshock therapy? I personally do not think I could resort to that even for extreme cases but I am sure many people do not agree with me.