Reflection

Reflection

It was interesting to see what scores increased and what scores decreased on our little surveys. My overall satisfaction with life has gone up I think because my boyfriend has helped me with a lot of aspects in my life. However, my psychological score went down and my NAS (negative affect?) went up. I think this is because I’ve been so stressed lately.

Honestly, I don’t really think the class has helped me with anything. But to the class’ credit, I didn’t put much effort in. I’m a senior with way more important classes to be focusing on. Maybe if I had been able to take the class at an earlier point in my college career, it would have benefited me more. Hopefully improvements will be made to class to make even more beneficial and a more positive experience overall.

Sleep Journal

Sleep Journal

Tracking my sleep made me realize that I usually sleep 9-10 hours. Dr. Mountcastle mentioned that 7-9 hours is ideal, so I may be oversleeping when I sleep 10 hours. I tend to go to bed between 1am-2am and wake up around 11am. If I ever naturally wake up before 10am, I’ll go back to sleep for another hour or so. It may be a good idea for me to just go ahead and get up when my body wakes up, no matter if I think it’s too early for me. I’ve never signed up for a class that starts earlier than 11am because I know I’m a terrible morning person. I used to sleep 11-14 hours a day and be on the verge of narcolepsy.

My room has to be cool and pitch dark, and the fan needs to be on for me to fall asleep quickly. I absolutely cannot fall asleep in a completely silent room. I need some type of white noise to feel at ease. Generally, I feel decently rested during the day. I only feel super tired when I have to get up earlier than 10am or if I had to pull an all-nighter. I feel most sluggish when I first wake up. If I’m really tired and have the time, I’ll take a nap in the middle of the day. It may benefit me to go to bed earlier and also get up earlier, but I enjoy staying up late. I may try a sleep schedule of going to bed at midnight and getting up at 9am because I really need to start working out again. I have a gym in my apartment building that I’ve never stepped in!

Sleep Journal

Sleep Journal

Tracking my sleep made me realize that I usually sleep 9-10 hours. Dr. Mountcastle mentioned that 7-9 hours is ideal, so I may be oversleeping when I sleep 10 hours. I tend to go to bed between 1am-2am and wake up around 11am. If I ever naturally wake up before 10am, I’ll go back to sleep for another hour or so. It may be a good idea for me to just go ahead and get up when my body wakes up, no matter if I think it’s too early for me. I’ve never signed up for a class that starts earlier than 11am because I know I’m a terrible morning person. I used to sleep 11-14 hours a day and be on the verge of narcolepsy.

My room has to be cool and pitch dark, and the fan needs to be on for me to fall asleep quickly. I absolutely cannot fall asleep in a completely silent room. I need some type of white noise to feel at ease. Generally, I feel decently rested during the day. I only feel super tired when I have to get up earlier than 10am or if I had to pull an all-nighter. I feel most sluggish when I first wake up. If I’m really tired and have the time, I’ll take a nap in the middle of the day. It may benefit me to go to bed earlier and also get up earlier, but I enjoy staying up late. I may try a sleep schedule of going to bed at midnight and getting up at 9am because I really need to start working out again. I have a gym in my apartment building that I’ve never stepped in!

Don’t Just Think Outside the Box, Be Out of the Box!

Don’t Just Think Outside the Box, Be Out of the Box!

This week’s topic came at a really good time. Monday night my boyfriend and I had a fight. In the heat of the moment I wasn’t thinking clearly, but when I calmed down I thought about the “out of the box” concept. Neither me nor my boyfriend were thinking about the other’s feelings. Worse yet, the argument was over something very stupid. In hindsight, I think I started the argument in relation to my abandonment issues and exacerbated it. My boyfriend’s reaction to our argument was to simply ignore me and cut me off. I didn’t hear from him for over 24 hours. I drove myself crazy during that time with thoughts like “he doesn’t care about me”, “he’s probably thinking about breaking up with me”, and “he would never love me anyway”. I think this also goes along with the deprivation and unlovability schema (which I can see in myself anyway).

Once we started talking, I felt very silly about the whole situation. Though I still feel justified in feeling hurt for being ignored, I should not have reacted the way I did. To try to get a hold of my issues, I could try the steps listed in our reading: acknowledge what’s going on, be open to my feelings, notice my thoughts, what do they remind me of, and look for a pattern. These issues are probably what has lead to past failed relationships. Next time an argument begins to brew, I need to step back and assess the situation before I react. I need to make an effort if I ever hope to improve.

 

Now enjoy this sad looking Yoshi, who also has abandonment issues.

Acts of Kindness

Acts of Kindness

This week had a focus on positive emotions. As stated in the Fredrickson article, positive emotions can improve overall emotional wellbeing. One act of kindness I did this week is give my boyfriend a small gift. He has been down this week because he got in a car accident a few days ago, and I wanted to lift his spirits. We both felt positive emotions from the act and felt good. I felt like a good, supportive girlfriend.

The second act of kindness I did occurred at work. A woman was trying to buy diapers and wipes for her infant, but she was a dollar short. I gave her the dollar so she could buy what she needed for her baby. It made me feel good to help a struggling mother.

The picture I provided is an example of a small act of kindness that can mean the word to someone.

What’s My Mission?

What’s My Mission?

The one change I know I need to make is to put myself out there more. In my professional and personal life. However, I’m still not clear in how to do that. I’ve become so comfortable with how things are, that I don’t feel motivated to push myself to do more.

I like that Dr. Wu-Pong shared with us that she wasn’t always clear in  what she wanted to do. With the input of others, she figured it out. I feel like I know what I want to do, but maybe if I listen to other’s input, things will become more clear for me as well.

Dr. Wu-Pong mentioned something else very important: you need to think about your current happiness level; not what could possibly make you happy in the future. The reading on happiness reiterates this by saying that happiness improves thorough intentional changes, not circumstantial ones. If I want to improve the happiness level in my personal and professional life, I need to make active changes.

My major is psychology, and sometimes I feel like I don’t have the proper people skills to be in this field (even though I don’t want to be a therapist). Sometimes I can be too introverted for my own good. I need to take baby steps in putting myself out there more, and eventually my skills will improve.

From Mind Full to Mindful

From Mind Full to Mindful

I think we have all experienced someone else’s emotions influencing our own. If your friend is sad, you’re sad, and vice versa. Mindfulness creates self-awareness which can in turn improve our social relationships. For example, instead of overreacting to a situation, we remain calm and rational because we are more self-aware. Like mentioned in lecture, mindfulness can reduce the gap between our exhibited behaviors (like cutting someone off) and who we really are (a safe driver).

As stated in Dr. Brown’s reading, mindfulness training can improve our attention, psychological well-being, and interpersonal relationships. Being mindful involves being more aware of everything around you: your surroundings, other people, and of course, yourself. It is being in the present; not dwelling on the past or anticipating the future. When you are more aware of these things you start to see how everyone is interconnected. With this insight, you learn more about why it is important to treat others with fairness and kindness, which impact your behaviors positively.

From Mind Full to Mindful

From Mind Full to Mindful

I think we have all experienced someone else’s emotions influencing our own. If your friend is sad, you’re sad, and vice versa. Mindfulness creates self-awareness which can in turn improve our social relationships. For example, instead of overreacting to a situation, we remain calm and rational because we are more self-aware. Like mentioned in lecture, mindfulness can reduce the gap between our exhibited behaviors (like cutting someone off) and who we really are (a safe driver).

As stated in Dr. Brown’s reading, mindfulness training can improve our attention, psychological well-being, and interpersonal relationships. Being mindful involves being more aware of everything around you: your surroundings, other people, and of course, yourself. It is being in the present; not dwelling on the past or anticipating the future. When you are more aware of these things you start to see how everyone is interconnected. With this insight, you learn more about why it is important to treat others with fairness and kindness, which impact your behaviors positively.

The Thinker

The Thinker

I mostly agree with the results of my strengths. However, I disagree with the “deliberate” strength. It was described on Gallup as someone who is very organized and is the type of person to plan everything. This is the opposite of me. I am a messy person, and I hate planning. I am a complete “go with the flow” type of person, which is where my adaptability strength comes in. Being able to adapt to new situations is an extremely important trait to have in your professional and even everyday life.

The strength I most see in myself is intellect. I am always in my head and thinking. While this isn’t always a good thing, it is who I am. I would like to learn how to hone in this strength and really have it benefit me.

I learned from our in-class exercise that most of my strengths are uncommon in relation to the class. There were a lot of people concentrated in the relationship-building category, but the only strength I have in that category is adaptability.

I think my strengths can be beneficial to my chosen profession if I learn how to build upon them. I agree with Dr. Wu-Pong that it is better to concentrate on our strengths rather than our weaknesses. The Gallup website suggested that I write down my thoughts since I have so many of them. I think this could help me collect my thoughts and allow me to be more present, instead of always daydreaming.

High Quality Relationships

High Quality Relationships

Honestly, I have trouble establishing high quality relationships. The well-being exercise we did online told me that I am “suffering” in the social aspect of my life, which makes sense. I’m introverted and usually have a difficult time making meaningful contributions to the conversation (mostly with small talk). The exercise we did in class where we were supposed to make a high quality connection with someone was mostly awkward for me. I didn’t know what to say, and when I did say something, I didn’t know how to keep it going. I moved to Richmond back in August, and I still haven’t really made any true friends. I recently entered into a romantic relationship however, which I believe has grown into a high quality relationship.

There are three characteristics that a connection must have in order to be high quality as mentioned in our reading this week: there must be a sense of vitality, a sense of positive regard, and a feeling of mutuality.

I think my greatest quality in regards to this topic is my listening skills. When I am engaged in communication with someone I can listen very well. However, I do admit that I can be a bad listener when I am uninterested in the interaction.

Romantic Relationships

Romantic Relationships

In lecture this week we discussed what makes a romantic relationship competent. These characteristics may vary from person to person, but I think most can agree on some points we made in class like trust and communication. These aspects are important in a relationship in any stage of life. However, some may be different for young adults and later adulthood. A young adult may value looks more, while a person in their later adulthood may value financial stability more.

We also touched on how attachment style greatly affects one’s romantic relationships in class. In addition, Dr. Salvatore’s reading states how one’s cognition, affect, and behavior relate to romantic relationships.  I know I have an insecure attachment, which has reflected in my failed past relationships. I accepted what I felt like I deserved, which was less than acceptable. I am just now entering a relationship in my young adulthood, and I think/hope this one will be healthy.

I really admire my parent’s relationship. They are wise enough to not sweat the small stuff and pick their battles. I think this makes for a successful marriage. They do have their struggles though because they are both very different from each other. This can either be a good thing or a struggle for them.

SOH- Week 4

I believe that anxiety can be helpful, though I do not think depression can be. I have struggled with depression for years, and cannot think of a single positive aspect of it. Anxiety, however, can be helpful in certain circumstances. It can help you keep you on your toes and be alert, and maybe even enhance performance. But when anxiety is chronic, it can be detrimental. The “Does This Mean I’m Crazy?” article lists common worries of those with chronic anxiety or depression.

A person with a positive personality style definitely has an edge over the pessimists. Those who think positively tend to be more positive, and those who think negatively tend to be negative. Negativity could lead someone to be more susceptible to anxiety and depression.

In the exercise I learned that people cope with stress in different ways. I tend to withdraw and deal with things on my own, but other people may reach out to others for support. My strategy may not be the best, so next time I am really stressed I may try to reach out to a friend instead.

SOH Week 3- Survey Results

The results of my survey seemed pretty accurate to me. However, I did not think of myself as a “sensation seeking” type of person before. I love to have a nice day in and just be lazy. I do like to experience new things just for the sake of experience, though. I scored low on impulsivity, which is no surprise. I scored below class average for the SURPS on impulsivity and on the money survey for impulsivity. My score for hopelessness was high, which concerns me. I am a very logical and rational person, which greatly influences my cognitive style. I always think things through. I do think that your gut instinct can mostly be trusted, but it’s always good to think about the possible consequences.

SOH Week 2

I’m the person who is pretty much figuring life out as it comes. For now I don’t feel as if I have much purpose. Maybe my purpose right now is to actually find my purpose.

My obstacles are certainly more internal than external. I get in my own way through my anxiety. If I had a better support system I believe I could overcome this. The key to a more fulfilling life for me I think is making more friends. Unfortunately, my anxiety and reserved nature make it difficult for me to make friends. I need to push myself to put myself out there more.

This class has so far given me hope that I can accomplish this. I need to view myself positively and actively create positive emotions in my everyday life.

SOH Week 1- Well-Being

Overall well-being has several components: physical, mental, and emotional. In order to be in a state of good well-being, one must be healthy and happy. Physical well-being includes maintaining a healthy weight, eating healthy, and being physically fit. Mental and emotional well-being consists of being happy in your everyday life, coping with life’s stressors in a healthy and constructive manner, and managing any mental illness you may have.

It can be difficult to obtain high well-being, especially being in college. We are a broke and stressed out population. However, we should all do our best to be our best.