Groupthink in Beta

N30n Ra1nb0w

1. Is the purpose of the Inquiry Project clear? Does it clearly address a problem, provide necessary background information to understand the problem, and establish a thesis to respond to the problem? Is the thesis clear, debatable, and significant? The purpose of this inquiry project isn’t very clear. The thesis is established but not clear. It’s a little confusing. They say “should educational communication system be updated to follow up with the modern technology?” at the end of their introduction paragraph and i don’t think that flows right.I think rephrasing the question and thesis would be helpful. 2. Is the research included in the Inquiry Project substantial? Does the author draw from quality sources to establish key ideas (definitions, concepts, claims, etc.) regarding the project’s focus? Beta project isn’t finished yet, but from the paragraph she posted the research was substantial. I didn’t get to see too much of the actual inquiry project, but from the looks of the portion she posted, I think she’s on the right track with using her research to establish her points and ideas. 3. Are the sources appropriately referenced and cited? Are signal phrases fully utilized? Sources are appropriately referenced. Signal phrases are somewhat used. However, I think that they could be made more apparent before introducing a quote. 4. Are the main points of the argument to support the thesis clear, well-reasoned, and sufficiently supported with the research? (Indicate what is particularly at issue and explain.) Their main points could be a little more clear but I think they are well-reasoned. It isn’t clear because I’m still unsure of what the purpose of this inquiry project is. This is due to their thesis being confusing. Once the thesis and inquiry question is rephrased I think it will be a lot better and easier to determine. 5. What’s the most important thing the author needs to consider and/or add before completing the Inquiry Project for the course? I think the author needs re-write her thesis to make it a little more clear what she’s trying to prove. This will help her expand on her ideas for her main claims and help the readers connect the main claims to the topic of her essay.  

Zahra’s

1. Is the purpose of the Inquiry Project clear? Does it clearly address a problem, provide necessary background information to understand the problem, and establish a thesis to respond to the problem? Is the thesis clear, debatable, and significant? Yes, thesis is clear and they addressed problem. Their thesis is debatable and significant. 2. Is the research included in the Inquiry Project substantial? Does the author draw from quality sources to establish key ideas (definitions, concepts, claims, etc.) regarding the project’s focus? The research is substantial and the author does a good job with getting sources to establish her point. I think the sources she used helps prove her main claims well. 3. Are the sources appropriately referenced and cited? Are signal phrases fully utilized? Signal phrases are somewhat used. I think she could work on them more and it would give a lot more to her essay. She did reference them correctly at the end of her essay in her works cited however. 4. Are the main points of the argument to support the thesis clear, well-reasoned, and sufficiently supported with the research? (Indicate what is particularly at issue and explain.) The main points are clear and well-reasoned. I see no problems with her main points and how they are written. The main points answer the thesis well. But like I said previously, she could work on her signal phrases to make it flow better when she is introducing sources. 5. What’s the most important thing the author needs to consider and/or add before completing the Inquiry Project for the course? I honestly think the author did a great job and it seems she is almost done with her inquiry project. If I was her I’d just go and make the essay flow more with the first and last sentences of each paragraph. She just need to make sure her organization is to the best of her ability. Also work on signal phrases. But other than that just look back at the entire essay and just spell-check and look at grammar and she should be golden.

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